Things heard in passing -- at the mall, on the sidewalk, in waiting rooms -- absolutely out of context. No IDs on the speakers. Nothing to do but enjoy the weirdness and make up your own back story. Date range is mid-2012 to the present.
Young woman on cell phone:
"When you're crying at your own wedding, because you don't really want to go through with it. Well, there is just something wrong with that!"
Older woman to friends, in state forest exhibit building:
"So we asked her, 'Do you realize you just drove through three stop signs!?' And she says, 'I've been driving!?'"
Gaunt, 40-ish man, approaching strangers on the street:
"I'm better than any GPS!"
Boy, age 12 or 13, at small-town festival:
"I'm so full of sugar! I need some real food."
Customer in Volkswagen showroom, to salesman:
"My dad says I should buy a Buick. I told him I'm not that old."
Pastor on phone to parishioner:
"I heard you fell off a bar stool."
Young man to friend, in college town:
"She was so close to finishing!"
- Young woman to somewhat older woman:
"He's getting out of jail tomorrow. We don't know if he'll be coming to look for us."
- Middle-aged man to middle-aged woman:
"There's no grass growing under her tongue!"
- Fifty-ish woman to female relative:
"He was always overdrawing his checking account, so we just add $200 to it every month. He says to me, 'Mom, I don't understand why this keeps happening'."
- Heavy woman to clinic nurse who had just given her fasting instructions:
"Twelve hours? I'll starve to death by then!"
- Social worker to group of newly-arrived nursing home residents:
"Remember, it's illegal to get married on a dare."
- Stylish woman on cell phone:
"I had this sense that the walls were on fire."
- Church deacon to church janitor in church dining room:
"She was on top of him like this."
- Mid-40s man with crewcut, in fast food restaurant:
"Well, I wonder how much money I lost today."
- Short-haired 60-ish woman in grocery store, talking to similar woman about someone not there:
"Oh, yeah. She always starts talking about someone as soon as they're not there."
- Toddler in shopping cart, to mother, pointing across the Walmart:
- Young woman to middle-aged woman in Target store:
"That short kid who looks like he's 12? She married him!
- Older man in post office, to clerk:
"I just hope this package doesn't start talking when I put it in the truck!"
- Coed on phone, walking along campus sidewalk:
"Of course, then I come home to a very, very, very, very dirty apartment."
- Two retirement-aged women at stadium, looking up at giant scoreboard screen between innings, showing men's underwear commercial:
- Mother to young son, in the Mall of America food court:
"Finish your chicken or you're not going on any rides."
- Little girl, climbing the 287-step Sir Walter Scott Monument in Edinburgh:
"It's the tower of never-ending stairs!"
- Scotsman moving through a narrow, crowded Edinburgh laundromat:
"You breathe in, I'll walk through."
- Bus driver from County Clare, at Stonehenge, describing a German tour guide:
"He spoke English so well, he could have been Irish!"
Please send me something entertaining that you have overheard. Let me know how you'd like to be identified, if at all.